happy 777

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&&I want to be the type of girl you remember.
I'm pretty much <kelly.
I'm tired of being stuck in bubble wrap.
Being the family's treasure, stuck in a box is not the biggest delight.
I want to see the world as it truely is.
I want to grow up and learn what is real.
Living in suburbia surounded by familiar faces, getting good grades, and pleasing my family is no longer all i want to strive for.
Yes, i know these things won't change.
I can face that, but I want MORE in my life.

I want to grow up knowing the truth about things.
I want to be able to open my eyes each day knowing that i'm not perfectly safe and secure,
I want to make a difference.

There are things that already make me stand out.
These things pretty much make me special,
and i know that with my past i can make a difference.

Unlike most kids,
i've been raise by a single dad.
It's only him and I now that my great grandma is dead,
and he supports this family by working at Norpac about 45mins away from home.
He is the best dad in the world.
He has rescued me from the depths of the sea,
saved me from the monsters,
and faught away the ninjas who did not deserve to take me away.
[all metaphores]

Unlike most kids,
my past, presence, and future pretty much depends on other people's mistakes.
A lot of things happen that I do not control,
I try to make things go my way,
and no matter how hard i try, nothing does.
I'm stubborn and I refuse to settle at a community college,
i refuse to date people who won't make me stand out,
and push me harder on my journey,
and i refuse to neglect God.
He is real.
I know this for a fact, no matter how many people try to convince me otherwise.

Unlike most kids,
i love art and spreading my opinion in ways other than talking.
-and Yes, i have an opinion.
I'm not perfect, and sometimes the things i say will hurt you.
Don't ever think that i'm attacking you on purpose,
i'm conciderate and nice as well.


Unlike most kids,
i get addicted and attached to things way too easily.
When they go,
a part of myself is gone as well.
It's not like i'm into drugs,
but i get very attached to certain lifestyles, foods, people, and animals.
I'm trying to cut myself short of everything that i am addicted to,
so that maybe i can live my who i am.


A preacher one day told us not to define ourselves by something physically on this earth.

I can't define myself by what i do,
such as help out with my youth environment squad,
throw things durring the track season,
make art,
go to church,
listen to music,
nor hang out with good friends.



I can't define myself by who I hang out with,
even if they are the coolest people on this earth.
Be jealous.

I can't define myself by what i own,
even though i love my non-existant pool,
my two adorable cats,
all of my precious music,
and this computer.

I can't define myself by what i look like,
which is okay with me.
I don't want people to judge me on how short I am nor how big of boobs i own.
I know i'm short, i've always been short, and i'll always be short.

If I can't define myself by these,
then what can i define myself as?


Yeah, here I am.

I'm pretty much Kelly.
Finally out of the box


This summer is dedicated to:
finding the truth.
© 2007 - 2024 missgray777
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dt-990's avatar
God is real? More importantly, its not a she? :P

A few quick thoughts:

Everyone wants more, but ultimately its up oneself to get more.

Don't bother with community college if you have any direction. I wasted a few years there when I should have gone straight to UO. Also go to school at least a few hours away from home. Getting out of your comfort zone is an enlightening way to live.

All these things are the things that you do list do define you to as a person adapts to his/her environment. As general modern psychology teaches ,One singular event can't create a definition for a person nor will all events as another person may react differently to all said scenarios but if you tally up the genetics (Traits and prone behaviors) with these events you eventually arrive at an individual. This is why its easy to imagine the "What ifs" as we're rather self aware that outside events can affect us and change us. "What if I were rich?" or "What if I met the love of my life tomorrow?" So your reactions, are what makes you who your are, but reactions alone aren't who we are as we react based on previous reactions.


So anyhow, what is the truth you're looking for?